Oysta Buns' thoughtful and serious 2010 All-Star picks.
AL:
C - Joe Mauer, Twins
What to say, Joe is the man. What's great is how he hosed the Twins. In 2009, he hit for power for the first time, 28HR after missing the first month of the season. Then he signed his big long-term contract, with the Twins thinking they'd get more of the same in 2010. Instead, Joe's hit only two (!!) home runs by the end of play, June 6, 2010. Only two homers in more than two months of play - way to go, Joe! And he's currently ~ 50 points behind Ichiro in BA!
Just wait until Mauer can no longer catch and is moved to the OF or 1B, still hitting with little power! He can battle with Ichiro for highest BA and fewest homers!
Slap those opp-field singles, Joey boy! Slap those puny singles, slap! Slap those opp-field singles, Joey boy! And keep on doing it until you can hit one more long fly! Long fly....
1B- Justin Morneau, Twins
Great first half, is primed for his usual second half swoon. Every Morneau season is like Don Mattingly's career. Let's hope there's no "horseplay" involved in this case.
2B- Cano, Yankees
Has positive (Jeter) and negative (A-Rod) role models with him in the same infield.
SS- Andrus, Rangers
Give youth a chance. Just ask Young.
3B- Evan Longoria, Rays
That's "Evan," not "Eva."
RF - Ichiro Suzuki, Mariners
Teammates still think he's selfish.
CF - Brett Gardner, Yankees
Putting him in CF. Thickest neck for a player with no power.
LF - Crawford, Rays
Free agency awaits.
DH - Vlad Guerrero, Rangers
Funny, he doesn't look Russian.
Pitcher - Hughes, Yankees
Phil, remember Ken Clay?
NL:
C - McCann, Braves
Not many choices here, they all stink.
1B- Albert Pujols, Cardinals
Let's hope that Big Al is not getting anything from McGwire other than batting tips.
2B- Chase Utley, Phillies
Nap Lajoie is getting jealous. Gehringer needs a recharge. Hornsby is eating a steak (and not watching any movies). Collins is cocky.
SS - Ramirez, Marlins
I like his hustle. A team player, respects his manager.
3B- Zimmerman, Nationals
No, David Wright, selection is not based on how many times you can strike out.
RF - Andre Ethier, Dodgers
Andre needs to ask Sam Thompson for some advice on that finger. Ouch.
CF - Jayson Werth, Phillies
Hit 20 doubles in his first 37 games. Earl Webb, look out!
LF - Holliday, Cardinals
Still missing Colorado? Is McGwire making him kick his leg up again?
Pitcher - Jiminez, Rockies.
How's that rotator cuff holding up, Jiminy?
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